A businessman was going bankrupt and was thinking about going to Canada for medical assistance – in dying. "Cheer up," said a friend. "Things could be worse. You could be one of your creditors."

Two friends run into each other at the store. "How's business?" one asks the other. The other put his hands to his head and sighs. The friend says, "For this time of year, that's not bad."

Abraham Lincoln was asked how he felt felt after one of his defeats. Abe said he felt like the little boy who stubbed his toe in the dark. "He was too old to cry, but it hurt too much to laugh."

After Churchill's big defeat, his wife suggested that it might be a blessing in disguise, and he said, "At the moment, it is very well disguised."

Morris Udall ran for President in the 1976 primaries and lost. When asked for a comment, he said, "The voters have spoken. The bastards."

A politician was asked to comment on the man who succeeded him. He said that the guy had a "bungalow mind." No upper story.

In 1961, Richard Nixon was asked what he thought of JFK's inaugural address. Nixon said that there as one line he wished he had said. "I do solemnly swear."

P.S. Most of those lines are from a Jim Bishop column from many years ago, on a book by Gerry Blumenfeld, "Some of My Best Jokes Are Jewish" (column "Jewish Humor is Gentle, Philosophical, and illogical," or from Bob Dole's book, "Great Political Wit; laughing (almost) all the way to the White House."

I'm so old I can remember when political competition didn't equate with a capital offense, and a GOP President could be friends with the Democrat speaker of the House.

PPS. There are three kinds of people: those who make things happen, those who watch what happens, and those who say, "What just happened?"

I know what just happened. ('m just saying things could be worse.

Or get much worse.

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