The courage to come out from under the GLBT umbrella

By Frances Kelly

If you believe the gay agenda and same-sex marriage are all about love and commitment, meet Dawn Stefanowicz who wrote about her experiences growing up in the shadow of her father's homosexual lifestyle in her memoir Out From Under.

To mark the fifth anniversary of the release of her book, Catholic World Report interviewed Stefanowicz.

Excerpts from the Catholic World Report must-read interview:

In my home there would be my father's partners and male friends, and they would often take me along to meeting places in the GLBT community. I was just a child, but I was exposed to overt sexual activity. When I was about nine, for example, my father took me to a downtown sex shop. He said he wanted to expose me to sexuality so that I wouldn't be prudish. There was no sense of privacy around sexuality. Sex was very public; that was part of the gay culture.

Once, when I was in the 10th grade, I was excited because my father came to school to watch me perform in the band. He never did before. I saw his eyes bug out when he saw all the teenage boys performing on the stage with me. Then I realized that he was not there for me, but to pick up young men.

He'd tell me to dress provocatively, and wear this or that top, and we'd go out cruising. A man may identify himself as gay, but my dad knew they still liked attractive young women. Or, it could be a way to attract bisexual or heterosexual men.

My father liked well-dressed, "clean cut" men, who were about 10 years younger than he was. It was always a younger man, never the same age or older. I knew many gay men who had a preference for adolescent males who had just hit puberty. They would look for boys with absent fathers who were vulnerable.

Other adult children that came from same-sex environments shared with me that they had been [abused]. There is higher risk of sexual abuse in such an environment.

I should also add that as a woman, I did not feel valued, appreciated, or loved. It was a demeaning environment for me. I saw a lot of confusion about gender; my father, for example, sometimes dressed in women's clothes. Or, you might see one of my dad's male partners taking on a "pseudo-female" role.

I was born under the GLBT umbrella. I didn't choose that. Coming out from under has been lonely. But doing so has given me a freedom and a happiness that I want to share with others.

© Frances Kelly