Selwyn Duke
Top ten things Putin said to Obama about Ukraine
FacebookTwitter
By Selwyn Duke
March 29, 2014

While Barack Obama's recent telephone conversation with Russian president Vladimir Putin about the Crimean standoff has been widely reported, the exact substance of the discussion has remained a mystery.

That is, until now.

Owing to highly placed confidential sources, I'm pleased to report that I have become privy to some of the details of their talk. What follows are the top ten things Putin said to Obama:
    10. Look, the Ukrainians have a country; they didn't build that. Somebody else made that happen.

    9. I'm just fulfilling the dreams from my father.

    8. I can't help myself; I'm a typical white person.

    7. For the first time in my adult lifetime, I'm really proud of your country.

    6. Yes, we can.

    5. No, you can't.

    4. No matter how this turns out, Barry, I'll R-S-P-E-C-T you in the morning.

    3. I promise never to threaten any of your 58 states.

    2. If I had a new province, it would look like Ukraine.
And number 1...
    • If you like your foreign policy, you can keep your foreign policy.
The president reportedly was somewhat befuddled after the conversation and told an aide, "When does persuasion become invasion? I don't know, that's above my pay grade." Meanwhile, Putin is said to have explained to a close advisor, "I figured that after his election, I'd have more flexibility."

© Selwyn Duke

 

The views expressed by RenewAmerica columnists are their own and do not necessarily reflect the position of RenewAmerica or its affiliates.
(See RenewAmerica's publishing standards.)

 

Stephen Stone
HAPPY EASTER: A message to all who love our country and want to help save it

Stephen Stone
The most egregious lies Evan McMullin and the media have told about Sen. Mike Lee

Siena Hoefling
Protect the Children: Update with VIDEO

Stephen Stone
FLASHBACK to 2020: Dems' fake claim that Trump and Utah congressional hopeful Burgess Owens want 'renewed nuclear testing' blows up when examined

Cliff Kincaid
Cliff Kincaid interviews Susan Daniels [VIDEO]

Rev. Mark H. Creech
Toward a world that is not yet, but ought to be

Cliff Kincaid
Cliff Kincaid interviews Jack Cashill [VIDEO]

Mark Shepard
Who is your God?

Jerry Newcombe
The Creator and the Scopes Trial

Cliff Kincaid
Interview with filmmaker Joel Gilbert [VIDEO]

Steve A. Stone
The Slow Coup, Part 21

Curtis Dahlgren
George Washington walks into a bar

Linda Goudsmit
Use it or lose it

Tom DeWeese
The three 'E's of Agenda 21/2030, or Eugenics, Eviction, Enslavement, Take 2

Rev. Mark H. Creech
Grace for the days I don’t want to pray

Tom DeWeese
Data centers: Growing dangers
  More columns

Cartoons


Click for full cartoon
More cartoons

Columnists

Matt C. Abbott
Chris Adamo
Russ J. Alan
Bonnie Alba
Chuck Baldwin
Kevin J. Banet
J. Matt Barber
Fr. Tom Bartolomeo
. . .
[See more]

Sister sites