How we lost our constitutional republic

By Harold Witkov

Then the Lord appeared to Chief Justice Roberts and said, "The outrage of America is so great, and their sin is so grave! No longer are there any Americans who love and believe in the Constitution. Therefore be warned, I will do away with your beloved Constitutional Republic."

Chief Justice John Roberts came forward and spoke, "What if there should be fifty constitutionalists within America; will you then still destroy the Constitutional Republic?

And the Lord answered, "If you can show me fifty constitutionalists, fifty who love, understand and believe in the Constitution, I will forgive America for their sake."

Chief Justice Roberts then spoke up, asking, "What if forty should be found?" On and on Chief Justice Roberts bickered with the Lord and lower and lower went the number. Finally, Chief Justice Roberts asked the Lord, "What if ten pure constitutionalists be found? Will you then not destroy the Constitutional Republic?"

And the Lord answered Chief Justice Roberts, "For the sake of ten devoted believers in the Constitution, I will not destroy the Constitutional Republic. Now name them."

Chief Justice Roberts smiled, "That's easy."

Justice Roberts: Robert Bork

The Lord: Agreed

Justice Roberts: Mark Levin

The Lord: Agreed

Justice Roberts: Sean Hannity

The Lord: Agreed

Justice Roberts: Glenn Beck

The Lord: Agreed

Justice Roberts: Rush Limbaugh

The Lord: Agreed

Justice Roberts: Supreme Court Justice Samuel Alito

The Lord: Agreed

Justice Roberts: Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas

The Lord: Agreed

Justice Roberts: Supreme Court Justice Antonin Scalia

The Lord: Agreed

Justice Roberts: Supreme Court Justice Anthony Kennedy

The Lord: I guess he'll do

Then there was a long pause. Losing patience, the Lord demanded, "Well? That is only nine and you promised me ten!"

Chief Justice Roberts became perplexed. With indignation he called out to the Lord, "Isn't it obvious Lord? I am the tenth!"

And on the morning of Thursday, the 28th of June, 2012, the Constitutional Republic was no more.

© Harold Witkov