Ellis Washington
Symposium--No more sheets
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By Ellis Washington
November 18, 2015

Socrates (470-399 B.C.) was a famous Greek philosopher from Athens, who taught Plato, and Plato taught Aristotle, and Aristotle taught Alexander the Great. Socrates used a simple but cleverly profound method of teaching by asking revelatory, psychologically probing questions. The Greeks called this form Dialectic – starting from a thesis or question, then discussing ideas and moving back and forth between points of view to determine how well ideas stand up to critical review, with the ultimate principle of the dialogue being Veritas – Truth.


No More Sheets – Prophetess Bynum's 2001 book based on her 1999 sermon by the same title preached at Bishop T.D. Jakes' Woman Thou Art Loosed (WTAL) Conference.

"My advice to you is to get married: if you find a good wife you'll be happy, if not, you'll be a philosopher."

~ Socrates

"You see in your mind you trying to make him be like all the rest of the men that's there, and God wants to set you free. You're not ready for marriage. You're not single yet."

~ Prophetess Juanita Bynum, Sermon: No More Sheets

Characters:

Socrates

Prophetess Juanita Bynum


{Setting: Woman, 1999 Thou Art Loosed Conference, Atlanta, Georgia}

Socrates: We are gathered here today at my Symposium, at the Bishop T.D. Jakes' Woman Thou Art Loosed Singles Conference in Atlanta, Georgia with guest speaker the Prophetess Juanita Bynum.

I find singles conferences to be somewhat of a paradox – Here you have 60,000 single women crowded into this stadium presumably because they are dissatisfied with their current single estate? Do you recall this quote I once said regarding the question of marriage? – My advice to you is to get married: if you find a good wife you'll be happy, if not, you'll be a philosopher."

The paradox of marriage is that it is often synonymous with pressure and pain which are two seemingly negative qualities of life that if we overcome of necessity makes us stronger, wiser, and better people. Nevertheless, how can Humanity reconcile the paradox of singlehood when the ideal social status through the Ages is marriage?


Prophetess Juanita Bynum: {nervous, self-conscious} ... But because I have experienced that [singlehood] and am experiencing that there is no way I can talk about it without dipping in my own business, because you understand what I'm saying? I got to put myself out there, I'm kind of feeling nervous about that. And I'm sitting over there in the seat and I'm saying to God, "Don't mess me up like that because these are my secrets; these are my own little failures; these are my own little things that I have done that I don't want anyone else to know I've done."

And then the Lord said to me, "How can you help somebody, if you don't tell anybody where you've been? They've heard enough junk; they've heard enough Bible stories. And if you are like me I've gone into the bookstore and bought just about every book I could think of on being single, on how to be single, and how to walk single, and none of it really helped me until I began to experience Single-Life...

I've been single as a virgin...and then married, and then lived with a man and have experienced sex with a man, and then not married anymore, and then had to go through the whole trauma of – Oh, ya'll looking at me like this hear... {Bynum walks off frustrated – audience praises God} So if you've been married and divorced, I got you! If you was a virgin, I got you too... I've been to services and they told me, "Ball up a piece of paper and write his name on it, throw it over your shoulder and tell the devil that it's over!" And I did that and Bishop, it wasn't over! I wish I had somebody who didn't mind being real today...

Socrates: In my day, in ancient Greece there was a very popular School of Philosophy called the Stoics. The Stoics had the idea of Empiricism or knowledge obtain expressly through the five senses or sense perception alone; Metaphysical or Supernatural concerns were of little relevance to the Stoics. Prophetess, are you an Empiricist? Does your personal experiences guide or dominate your worldview, how you understand the Rules of Life?

Prophetess Juanita Bynum: Not exactly, Socrates, nevertheless I'm talking about my own experience. Even today I'm struggling with a couple of things right now. You don't – You don't won't me to tell the truth, right? {defiant tone} You want to stand up here and act like because I got this mike in my hand that I'm just so sold out for Jesus that don't nothing bother me. I'm just all in the anointing. I don't never get frustrated. I don't never want to fall and have me some sex. I don't never want to do nothing wrong. But the devil is a liar! Every day of my life I'm struggling to kill the flesh!

Socrates: Indeed, also in my day, in ancient Athens there was another very popular School of Philosophy called the Sophist who in ancient times were called "Sages," "Teachers," "Seers," "Diviners" and "Poets." For example, one of my philosopher contemporaries, Protagoras (490-420 B.C.), eagerly embraced the term Sophist, yet me, and my two chief disciples, Plato and Aristotle, rejected Sophism. Thus, in time we would reveal the true meaning of Sophists or Sophism for who they really are... Professional Liars, Deceivers, and Demagogues, who love the praises of Men rather than Veritas (truth).

According to the extant texts Sophists "were not seeking the truth but only victory in debate and were prepared to use dishonest means to achieve it. This produced the sense 'captious or fallacious reasoner or quibbler,' which has remained dominant to the present day."

Prophetess, what is your opinion on this subject?

Prophetess Juanita Bynum: I'm sick of people lying to me. Just come on and tell me the truth. Oh, come on here somebody. It's a fight everyday of your life. You in the mall, you see a fine man. You in the laundry mat, you see a fine man. And you keep wondering to yourself, "Lord, when is it going to be my turn?" "What am I doing wrong?"

Oh, I wish for one time I could forget that I was a prophetess and give him my phone number and sneak away and call him and give him my pager number... but there's something – [the Holy Ghost constraining me] ...

And I look at myself and you getting dressed up everything and you saying, "For what!?" There's got to me more to this than just travelling across the country and preaching, and preaching and everybody jumping and shouting. And then I got to back home sitting in my breakfast nook area across the table with my god sisters... {sudden mood change} who I get sick of looking at every day. Who – ya'll ain't goin' to say nothing in here... Lord, I know you got something for me, but I just want to know – Why am I not married?!

Ya'll can beg to differ if you want to but I find it very difficult to listen to anybody preach to me about being single, when they got a pair of thighs in their bed every night. And you rollin' over in the sheets and you telling me, "Hold on, Sanctify yourself!" And you going home to biceps and triceps and big ol' muscles and thighs. You got somebody giving you back rubs. No, No, No! – You go sit down! I want to hear, 'Hold on!' from somebody who is really holding on. I want to hear hold on from somebody who knows my struggle!



Socrates: Legendary Greek Playwrights and Philosophers like Hesiod, Aeschylus, Sophocles, and Euripides, all spoke about the Furies "who lived in the underworld and ascended to earth to pursue the wicked." According to the extant texts, "they were the daughters of Gaea (Earth) and sprang from the blood of her mutilated spouse Uranus." Does your Judeo-Christian traditions you preach from have a similar tradition of Spirits remaining in a person long after that person has left your presence?

Prophetess Juanita Bynum: The last person you really in love with and you haven't been really set free in your heart from; that Spirit from them – The reason why I know I wasn't ready [for marriage] was everybody that come along until you get delivered in your Spirit from all of the rest of the people you've been with, then wherever your mate is – You see that the reason you got people who are married and they still ain't satisfied and he can't satisfy you. You know why? Because his Spirit is in competition with all the rest of them Spirits that still live in you. He hugging you and you talking about {Bynum imitates a woman confusing two lovers} –
    Hug me like this. I don't want you touching me like that. Touch me like this. Roll me over like this. Throw me up, flip me over, turn me around. Spank me. Whip me... No, No, No! You got the wrong man baby. I'm a saved man. I'm a sanctified man.
No, No, No! You see in your mind you trying to make him be like all the rest of the men that's there, and God wants to set you free. You're not ready for marriage. You're not single yet!

I'm just going to tell you the truth. We always talking about, {in a servile voice} "All our Black brothers is going out and getting all these White ladies. And, and – What's wrong with us? We ain't good enough?

Naw, we too needy. We ain't got nothing – I'm supposed to be a helpmeet... When you get ready to get married, what are you bringing to the table, Ms. Sisterthing, besides eyeliner and lipstick? You ain't got no saving account. All of your credit cards is charged up and now you want somebody to be a rescue – Engine, Engine No. 9 and Zorro in your life and he got to come out and wipe out all of your mess. The devil is a liar! God is calling you to accountability today. It's time as the man of God said last night, Get yourself together!

Socrates: True words Prophetess you have spoken about Human Nature. I hear so many allusions to Nature in your sermon, so much Naturalism. Yet Human Nature is contrary to Natural Law, the Law of God because Nature conserves everything... nothing goes to waste in Nature, but Mankind wastes everything and appreciates nothing. Humanity would be better served learning lessons from Nature.

Prophetess Juanita Bynum: I read in the encyclopedia about the eagle – The eagle, when she chooses her mate. It blew my mind. The encyclopedia says she goes to the ground and she gets a stick, and she flies high on top of a branch, and the male eagle is just flying behind her. And she drops the branch out the tree, and it's his job to fly and catch the branch before it hits the ground. So he caught the first little twig. She said, "Alright, let me go get another one." This time she gets a branch about the weight of what a baby eagle would be. Because she wants to see if a baby eagle would ever fall, can you catch it? She drops it out the tree and he catches it and she says, "Alright, you did real good." But then she goes and gets a branch her same weight, and she drops it, but this time she flies high in the sky. She says, "Now if you can catch this, then I would know if anything were to ever happen to me, you could catch me!" And she drops the branch... {Praises to God}

I don't know about ya'll, but I don't want nobody that can't catch me in the Spirit. I don't want nobody that can't catch me in prayer; that can't catch me in my Spirit; that can't sense when something is wrong. I need an eagle-like Spirit that's got the power to intercede for me; to consecrate for me – To fast for me; to minister to me. Say YES!


Loving attention: The proud parents of two baby bald eagles guard their newborns

He's calling all of us. He's calling every last one of us to prayer and consecration. He's calling us to accountability... He's calling you to submission. He's calling you to submit to authority. He's calling you to pay your bills. When you leave out of this conference He doesn't want you going out again with your mind on getting married, but He wants you to leave out of here with your mind on getting single.

Now the Lord said to me, "I got to process you now." And I said, "What do you mean?" And He said, "Oh you can stop thinking about getting married – it's going to be a good little while before you get married because you see first of all now I got to start taking off layers. {Bynum starts removing sheets she was covered in}

One man it took me about maybe a year and a half of consecration – It's so real, Bishop. About a year and a half before all the dreams – And you know it last but about 5 or 10 minutes but the devil will play it like it was an hour. {laughter} You know most of us ain't had but a 5 Minute Man and the devil will try to make it seem like it was hours and hours and hours and hours and hours and hours – And you see that's to get your mind going again, and going again, and going again and desiring it, and he wasn't even all that...! It's a set up. You're imagination. It's a set up to get you going back into a trap.

When God dropped my last sheet – I had me a sugar daddy. Somebody bought me a car; bought me $500.00 Gucci boots and silk blouses – I was working on my job and didn't even have to cash my checks. I had two or three checks (paystubs) laying around on the dresser. He was giving me everything I want[ed]. But when the Holy Ghost began to do surgery on me on the inside – I'm talking about real surgery.

I came home one day after work and walked in my closet, and got everything he ever brought me and threw it in the middle of the floor. I said, "Anybody wants some clothes?" I don't want nothing the devil brought me. I don't want nothing he got – I gave away lamps. I gave away – I said, I don't care if my house is empty, I'm cleaning out my house. I don't want no neckless. I don't want no jewelry. I don't want no ring. I don't want no earrings. I don't want no car. I WANT TO BE FREE!


... No more sheets.


Book Notice

Please purchase my latest opus dedicated to that Conservative Colossus, Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas. Here are the latest two new volumes from my ongoing historical series – THE PROGRESSIVE REVOLUTION: History of Liberal Fascism through the Ages (University Press of America, 2015):
However, before the book is officially released to the public, I have to place 100 pre-publication orders (50 orders per each volume). I need your help to make this happen ASAP. Please place your order today for Volume 3 & Volume 4. Of course, if you can order all 100 copies today, the book will become official tomorrow.

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Invitation for manuscripts

I am starting a new a program on my blog dedicated to giving young conservatives (ages 14-35) a regular place to display and publish their ideas called Socrates Corner. If you know of any young person who wants to publish their ideas on any subject, have them send their essay manuscripts to my email at ewashington@wnd.com.

© Ellis Washington

 

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Ellis Washington

Ellis Washington is a former staff editor of the Michigan Law Review (1989) and law clerk at the Rutherford Institute (1992). Currently he is an adjunct professor of law at the National Paralegal College and the graduate school, National Jurisprudence University, where he teaches Constitutional Law, Legal Ethics, American History, Administrative Law, Criminal Procedure, Contracts, Real Property, and Advanced Legal Writing, among many other subjects... (more)

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